Yet again, its weigh in time

So Monday was my weigh in again. I had been telling myself all last week I just wanted 1.4 nothing more, nothing less. I wanted that 1.4 more than anything that I have ever wanted cause I knew that would put me at 15 pounds lost. My mom was joining that night so she could be apart of my celebration. I took off my heavy work clothes and put on my gym clothes, same outfit I had weighed in wearing the last 2 weeks. I went to the meeting and got in line, so nervous to step on that scale and so scared that it wouldnt show that 1.4 weightloss. I got up there and she got the number. Everything went through my head, "what did she see? did i lose? did I gain?" I was almost becoming overwhelmed when I told myself to breathe and go sit down with Heidi. She asked me how I did and I didnt wanna look. But I took a deep breath and slowly opened my booklet to reveal that I had LOST 1.4!!!!!! I was extatic! I was so proud of myself. I know that I can do this! Its mind over matter, which is easier said than done. This week I have stuck to plan really well. I have not been to the gym cause I have been struggling with a migraine. But Holly is joining the gym on Saturday so we are going to start going together, I hate going alone. My real test will come this weekend. I struggle with what I eat on the weekends. We always end up eating bad food. But Friday night my cousin is coming over and we are going to make dinner and hang out. I am going to go to Henry's and get a bunch of fruits and veggies. I need to make this change. I have to. I am going to be diabetic very soon if I dont. I am so greatful to have the love and support of my friends and family. I know that I can do this, I just need to set my mind to it. I watched that documentary "Supersize Me". Oh man, I never wanna eat fast food again. It was listing the things that can come from this type of lifestyle. What I am dealing with is bolded below. The study said:

"In the last 20-25 years there has been a double in overweight children which is responsile for:
*Hypertension
*Coronary Heart Disease
*Stroke
*Gall Bladder Disease (Had my Gall Bladder removed)
*Osteoarthritis
*Sleep Apnea (Slight version of this)
*Respiratory Problems
*Endonetrial Cancer
*Breast Cancer
*Prostate Cancer
*Colon Cancer
*Dyslipidemia
*Steatohepatitis
*Insulin Resistance (High Insulin levels are up to 99, mine is 103)
*Asthma
*Hyperaricemia
*Reproductive Hormone Abnormalities
*Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome
*Impaired Fertility
*Adult Onset Diabetes
Then he shared some scary statistics:
*1 of 3 children born in 2000 will have diabetes
*1 in 20 Americans have diabetes
*end*

I dont want any more than I already have. I dont want the cancers. I dont want diabetes. I dont want to die because I am overweight. So I am trying my HARDEST to look at life, food, exercise, everthing in a different way. I have GOT to lose the weight so that it doesnt kill me. I wanna be around a while...
~Chrissy